What I’m Doing This Summer…

One of my Constant Readers, Elizabeth over at The Garden Gate, responded to my last blog and had this to say…

“I would like you to answer a question please. Now that the kids are sleeping in every morning instead of fighting in the hallway and now that you’re not working for a living in the evening, just what WILL you be doing? Camping at Lake Winnywonga like the other 99% of Canadians, or sciving off doing nothing? The public has a right to know (no pun intended, Left to Right).”

So I thought, hey, what the heck?  Let’s actually answer that one!

So, let’s take this a piece at a time, shall we?

“I would like you to answer a question please.”

This is going to be my first point.  Elizabeth said “please.”  She’s very nice.  Nicer than me, by a long shot.  I’m rude guy (rude dude? – what a great name for a blog!) and I rarely say please.  So, because she’s very nice, I’m going to actually do this thing.  See?  Nice doesn’t always  finish last, does it?  Heck no.

“Now that the kids are sleeping in every morning instead of fighting in the hallway…”

Let me correct that particular fallacy right up front.  Only one of my kids is sleeping in every morning.  That would be The (unemployed) Boy.  The Girl is gainfully employed Monday through Friday, earning as much as she can to help pay for Carleton next September.  And let me correct fallacy number two.  The Boy and the Girl are brother and sister…so there is still fighting in the hallway.  Skirmishes in the kitchen.  Arguments in the living room.  Snarking in the basement.  Evil looks in all the other rooms.

Yeah, that shit don’t stop.

Next!

“…and now that you’re not working for a living in the evening…”

Well, okay, let’s set this one straight too.  I’m not working for pay in the evening.  Don’t mean I ain’t still working.  I’m still writing most every night, and there’s an unending “honey-do” list that I simply want to torch.  There’s dinners to cook, dishes to clean up, a dog to walk…

“…just what WILL you be doing? Camping at Lake Winnywonga like the other 99% of Canadians, or sciving off doing nothing?”

I’ll be doing all of the above, plus working at getting the Girl more proficient at highway driving, so she can acquire her G license before the move to Ottawa.  I’ve got hedges to chainsaw and a big pile of foliage in the back yard that needs to be trucked to the dump…

Okay, gotta ask.  Lake Winnywonga?  I assume you made that up, as even a Google search delivers up diddly.  I’d love to do some fun vacationy things like the other 99% of Canadians, but this summer’s all about the Girl and Her University.  With a little bit of the Boy and hopefully a Job thrown in.  Because if I have to listen to his XBox babble everyday, I may have to do some damage to him.

And wonky term number two…sciving off?  That’s a new one.  Sounds British.

Phrasal Verb: Skive off

Meaning: Avoid doing work or other duty

Example: I pretended I was ill and SKIVED OFF on Monday.

Huh.  Perhaps I will pretend I’m ill and skive off on Monday.  Then I can hang at home and…oh, wait.  I work from home almost every day.

Crap.

No skiving off for Tobin.

“The public has a right to know (no pun intended, Left to Right).”

The public, for the most part, doesn’t even know I, or this blog, exist!  However, for the loyal few, the Constant Readers, there you go.  My summer is going to be boring as crap.  Beating the Boy, driving with the Girl, dumping foliage, hanging with the Wife…

In fact, the highlight of the summer may be the Festival of Fear in Toronto.  With any luck (all of you, cross your fingers and toes NOW!), my NO HOPE prequel story, VANISHING HOPE will be published in time for the Festival and I’ll get to sit behind a desk and play huckster for something I wrote!

Nothing exciting in Left to Writeland.  At least until August.

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